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BY JEFF THITOFF

This week’s edition of the Hangover is playing the role of an actual hangover. Play along, will ya? It’s December 31st and you are still young enough to party hard. Think age 25 (or 35, if you’re my friend Lee). So you party like it’s 1999, and perhaps you went overboard. Okay, you went beyond overboard – whatever that is.
Now it’s January 1st, and you are trying to piece together what went down the night before. You call your friend (only instead of January 1st, it’s really Monday, Nov. 23).
FRIEND: Hey, how you doing?
YOU: Been better. What on earth happened last night?
FRIEND:It got pretty crazy. What’s the last thing you remember?
YOU: We were making fun of the Lions-Browns game, saying we wouldn’t watch the game if we were paid to do it. I had a drink in one hand, Ricky Williams handed me something…
FRIEND:You don’t remember Stafford and Quinn? They combined for 726 yards and nine touchdowns in one of the most exciting NFL games this season.
YOU: OMG (remember, you’re young).
FRIEND: Do you remember when you fell off your stool and tried to play it off doing push-ups and saying you’re a better #3 receiver than Terrell Owens?
YOU: No, but my Makaveli is sore.
FRIEND: T.O. went 9 for 197 and a touchdown.
YOU: Did that happen before or after I dumped a 40-ounce in the ground in memory of Calvin Johnson’s fantasy season?
FRIEND: Good call. He had 161 yards and a score.
YOU: I vaguely remember trading for him. Thankfully, I was smart enough to pick up Ladell Betts and Jerious Norwood off the waiver wire before I started drinking.
FRIEND: Do you mean Rock Cartwright and Jason Snelling?
YOU: Rock? Snelling?
FRIEND: Yeah, the leading rushers for Washington and Atlanta this week.
YOU: This is making my head hurt. I have a vague memory of picking up Charlie Batch after Big Ben went out of the game. Pretty shrewd pickup for a drunk, eh?
FRIEND:Yeah, that was great. Batch is out for the season.
YOU: I’m done drinking…and hanging out with Ricky Williams.